A Day of Firsts

So, here I am, another voice coming through the ether.  What makes me think I can enter this new place without a location?  And, such a busy place it is.  With so many voices clamoring for attention spouting delicious recipes, earnestly divulging helpful hints, sending stunning pictures,  discussing political viewpoints, raising adorable children while working at demanding jobs, why should my musings pierce the elastic fabric that is our lives in 2012 and enter a different realm of thought?

It has a lot to do with a seismic change of attitude that has washed over me like a tidal wave.  I’m thinking—how appropriate that I am recording my first post as Hurricane Sandy bears down on the east coast.  Much as this storm, large and unwieldy and ready to do some serious damage, I am gathering the courage to speak in the first person.  No thinly veiled fiction to hide behind any more.  I’m not sure that I can do it.  But, I am determined to give it a try.

This attitude change—it’s hard for me understand.   I cannot find the “true north” that was my optimism, my navigational tool leading me through life.  Instead, I feel like a ship without a rudder just bobbing around carried by the tides, searching for direction.

I am at the point where most of life is behind me.  Looking back, however, is not a source of comfort and, for the first time, it’s hard to see opportunity looking forward.  So, as I said, here I am.

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